Junonia, Part 8: The Conclusion

The tracking number they gave me came alive later that day and I have actually received my order. They charged me the shipping that they had promised to refund, and I will call one more time to be removed from their mailing list. This was definitely a case of too little, too late.

The main problem here is not that the company had difficulty shipping my order on time. That happens--it's part of running a business like this one. The problem was the absolute lack of truthfulness or transparency, the piles and piles of lies (come on--a fake tracking number just to get me off the phone?), the clear message that Junonia does not care about their customers. As someone who works very hard to care about her customers, and works for a company that prides itself on doing so, I simply have no use for a company like Junonia.

Junonia, Part 7: Three Full Weeks Later

Last night I received a message on my phone from a mysterious Kelly at Junonia, who wanted to discuss my order with me. I called back, only to be told that she had just left, she only works until 6. I said to have her call me back today...and she did not. So I just called again. They said she had already gone home. I asked what time it was. It was 5. Um, ok, so 'six' means 'five' like 'in stock' means 'we have no idea' and 'in shipping' means 'we still have no idea'.

Then they told me that my order has shipped and gave me a tracking number. Oh, joy! I checked the tracking number on UPS and....it doesn't exist. Just like the FedEx tracking number they gave me two weeks ago. Somehow, I just can't get my hopes up.

Junonia, Part 6: Still In Process

Daphine tells me my order is 'in process'. I am beginning to wonder what that process is. Given the various forms my order has gone through, perhaps they are attempting to conjure it up with magic spells?

Junonia, Part 5: It's Back in the Box!

Riiiiight. According to Stephanie, today my order is 'in the shipping process' and 'just about to go out'. Of course, she can't tell me when it WILL ship or how long it has been 'in the shipping process'.

We'll see.

Junonia, Part 4: Day 18 and Still More Lies

Today's call to Junonia netted me an associate named Sherona. Sherona informed me that not only is my order not in a box, waiting for the UPS truck (as Friday's and Saturday's associates had told me), that no one has even begun on it. She said too many people ahead of me in line are still waiting on their orders. She has no idea, she said, why anyone would have told me differently.

I have some ideas.

Junonia, Part 3: The Count-Up Continues

I called. My 'waiting in a box for UPS' order...didn't go out with today's UPS shipment. Hmm...wonder why that is?

I did, finally, get a person on the phone (ironically male) who actually seemed to care, and is refunding my shipping, without being asked. Or, at least, he says he is...I have been lied to so many times that I do not dare get my hopes up.

And, no, no response from the ever-peppy Anne Kelley who is 'so happy to serve' me.

Junonia, Part 2: Still Falling Down on the Job

Yesterday I sent this letter to Junonia's uber-cheerful 'Founder' (sorry...have to listen to her 'we're so happy' message every time I call):

Anne,

I am sorry to say that I will never shop with your company again. I have also shared these sentiments on my blog, where I frequently write about issues we face as plus-size women, and about my journey towards a more active lifestyle.

The reason that I will no longer buy from your company is that I have experienced some of the worst customer service of my life in the last two weeks (outdone only be telecommunications companies). I work for [insert best customer service company in universe] and I simply cannot tolerate the practices of your company, from a consumer's point of view, as I would never treat a customer as I have been treated.

On January 7th I placed an order for three items, all listed in stock. The email confirmation I received said all items were in stock and would ship immediately. One week later, having received neither a shipping notice nor my package, I called your company and was informed that the order would ship out the next day and was given a Fedex Tracking number. I checked this tracking number the next day, and the next, and the next, with no results. I called again, I believe last Friday. At this point I was informed that my items were backordered and would have to wait for an inventory to be done, and that someone would call me back (no one ever did). I called again this Monday and was told the items would ship out on Tuesday or Wednesday and I would be given free next-day shipping. Today is Thursday and, having received no package, I called one more time. This time I was told that the items were there, but they simply aren't going to be shipped yet, and no one can tell me when I should receive them. This is two full weeks after the email confirmation, which stated that all items were in stock and would ship immediately. Apparently, there is another definition for 'immediately' of which I was not aware.

I understand from some of your representatives, who, frankly, did not seem to care about my order, that you moved your warehouse and stopped shipping all orders in order to do inventory. While I can understand the necessity of the first and the lure of the second, it is bad practice to not put a notice on your website, during the order process, and in the confirmation emails that all shipping is halted, so that your customers are not left hanging as I have been. I know that if you had placed an order with the company I work for, and for some reason we were not able to fulfill it on time, we would contact you to let you know, not leave you waiting for weeks and making call after call, getting a different story each time until finally you feel like your money and your items are being held ransom.

I hope in the future your company will provide both a good product and good service, but unfortunately, I am not willing to wait for it.

Sincerely,
Jennifer -----

Today I called again. They said that--happy news!--my items had been BOXED and were waiting for UPS. Yeah...right. Do they staff with snails and sloths, or what? Actually, having been told more than once over the last two weeks that my items were on the brink of shipping...I think it's hogwash.

Junonia

I am very sorry to say that I will never buy from Junonia again. This is unfortunate, because they carry items that are difficult to find elsewhere. But their customer service has been inexcusable.

Two full weeks ago, on January 7th, I placed an order. My order confirmation email specifically says all items are in stock and will ship immediately. As of today, they have not yet shipped. As of today, the only further communication has been when I have called them--they didn't call or email me to let me know that things were running extremely late. I have called four times and two of those times have been told everything was about to ship out. But it has not. Apparently they have moved their entire warehouse AND done a stop-all-shipping inventory during this time. No notices on the website to let customers know this would happen, though.

Where I work, you get an email if your items will arrive either early or late. We don't shut down an entire company to count things. We don't leave customers hanging. Unfortunately, we also don't sell plus-size active wear, so the search will continue.

I Know It Isn't Summer...

but I just found this site and it is really, really neat, so I thought I would pass it along. I haven't bought anything, just 'window shopped' but I have never seen such a huge collection of suits and, since I am likely never going to buy from Junonia again after my most recent experience with them, this find is certainly timely.

Swimsuits for All sells suits for size 8 and up. From functional to pretty, including post-mastectomy styles.

A Mental Exercise

Lately I have had fun with an exercise, I believe from Intuitive Eating, which goes something like this:

Imagine that a spell were cast on the world that locked everyone into their current weight. Nothing anyone would do from this time forward would change their weight one iota. Nothing you do will change your weight one single ounce! How would you live life differently?

Scary thought? It was for me, at first, as well. I could not imagine being happy at my current weight, so in my imagination, decades of misery stretched out before me. So sad!

Three years later, the story is different. And, that story in my imagination is much, much closer to my reality.

I eat freely, and in a way that feels good. I don't deny a hungry tummy the food it needs, and I rarely overfill it (and when I do, it's only by a smidge, no more pants-unbuttoning, uncomfortable belly!). I eat a variety of foods as my body requests them, from the 'healthy' foods to the 'fun' foods.

I move for the sake of moving and because I like how my body feels. My goals are different--to have strong legs, to go cross-country skiing, to have fun.

I buy and make clothes that fit me, right now. No more buying things that are too tight with the goal of fitting into them! No more denying myself clothes because I am too fat to deserve them! No more trying to hide or disguise the real me! And no more do I feel, after trying on something that doesn't work, that my body is the problem. Now I know it's the clothes.

I stop seeing myself through others' eyes, or my imaginary picture of others' eyes.

I love my physical self. I see all the positive things about my body now. It's strong and sturdy, with nice, dense bones, and curvy and sexy and it takes me where I want to go and it does what I want it to do.

What does your picture look like? What would letting go of the number on the scale set you free from? What richness could be added to your life?

My Full-Contact Sport of Choice

Here are the blouse and skirt I wore last night. Inexplicably, my blouse does not have pink piping. It is cute anyway.

Shopping with my mom is a full-contact sport. In 1 hour and six minutes minus travel time, I bought three outfits on my lunch break on Saturday at CJ Banks. She and a saleslady were tossing clothes over the top and running all over the store. Fortunately, the attendance hotline where I had to call to say I would be late coming back doesn't require the REASON for your lateness...no, really, boss, my mom is holding me hostage in a dressing room at the mall...no, she won't let me go until I try on this one sweater...

I had three main goals. I wanted a date outfit, a church/nice outfit and a casual outfit. I left with all three, although my mom bought half of one outfit 'cause I wasn't willing to pay for it, lol--and I thought it was illegal to pay full price for things but apparently I was wrong.

The dress is great...but on the invisible model in the picture, it isn't nearly as...um....curvy as it is on me. I haven't worn it out yet, as I need shoes and a good excuse. Casual outfit too casual to bother with linkies and pics :-P

The Clothes This Season

They are ugly!

I was remarking to Mrs. Pevensie the other day that the fat girl clothes are really ugly this spring. She informed me that the straight-sized clothes are equally hideous. I said that may be so, but straight-sized girls get a wider selection of hideous choices!

I don't know why I keep going to the stores and trying. When I go to Coldwater Creek, things are too dressy and expensive. When I go to CJ Banks, where I used to have good luck, it's like walking into my grandmother's closet. WalMart clothes are see-through, whether they mean to be or not, because the fabric is so cheap, and everything has a ribbed or drawstring hemline--this is not a good thing in my world. And Lane Bryant? They are out to get me. Every time I see a cute top on a fat girl at work and ask where she got it, the answer is Lane Bryant...only when I walk into that store, I can't find any cute tops!

All this to say that I think I have three outfits. And I work four days a week. And I have decided that I need a date outfit. Just in case. I mean, it's been years since I have been on one, so I figure the odds are in my favor, right? (don't tell me if I am wrong)

Just Plain Wrong

Since my Fairy Godmother apparently does not read my blog (and I am not willing to wait until the night of the ball for my gown and slippers to appear, anyway...although I DO have to work that day, there will be no fireplace cleaning), and I am not thinking mice will be stitching up a gown and cobbling shoes, and I don't buy lotto tickets, I figured I should get a pattern and make my own dress.

Apparently the mice are a better bet. I just looked through EVERY single pattern catalog that major fabric stores carry and NOT ONE has gown patterns in the plus size section. Apparently, we just aren't supposed to have any fun until we have starved ourselves into societal acceptance? Most gown patterns don't top a size 18 (and patterns have different sizes...for instance, I wear a dress size 24 but a pattern size 32...so an 18 would be about a size 12 in dress sizes, I am guessing), with a select few going all the way up to a 22. They probably don't think we can get dates, either, and what's the point of going anywhere without a man? (eyes rolling, here...)

I am not quite sure what I am going to do. My darling sister in law, who can design a pattern for just about anything, is too far away to help in this case. I may have to try it myself--been meaning to draft patterns, but had been hoping to begin with something a tad easier. You know, something that wasn't supposed to fit exactly against your body and that wasn't made out of satin?

I have been polling ladies and most are leaning towards a dark blue for me, although I have also heard seafoam green, dark purple, deep red, and several suggestions for 'sparkles'. I guess I am a sparkly person!

Have You Seen My Fairy Godmother?

I found out this morning that I have a formal ball to attend three weeks from tomorrow.

This should be a crime.

So, Fairy Godmother, I know you have been falling down on the job, but here's what I need:
An Igigi dress
Strappy Dansko heels
Spanx
And a date

In Search of the Perfect Dress

When I come home from work lately, I want to change straight into my new jammie pants. This is a bad thing, especially when one gets off work at 3 in the afternoon! I have good reason for this, though. My new jammie pants, in addition to being pink camo, are the softest fleece I have ever felt, and the most comfortable piece of clothing I own.

Additionally, putting together enough work outfits to last six days a week PLUS a church outfit on Sunday is wearing on my small wardrobe.

So you can see why I am searching for the perfect dress. It has to be a dress, because then I don't have to have more than one piece. It has to fit me, which dresses rarely due since apparently as you gain weight you are also supposed to grow taller, therefor all dresses in my size are made for 9 foot tall women or chunky cross-dressers. The bust hits me at the waist, the waist at the hips...let's just say it doesn't work well. It needs to be extremely comfortable, as I sit at a desk 8 hours a day talking on the phone (no, seriously, I get paid to do this). It needs to look really good as I work with about 200 men, but more importantly, I need to feel cute every day. It needs to be warm and cozy, for those days when I really did not want to get out of bed and need desperately to feel like I am wearing a security blanket.

And I need it in seven different colors. You know, just so people don't think I wear the same outfit every single day.

The Difference Between Boys and Girls

Those people who say there is no difference between boys and girls clearly aren't paying attention.

I work near the mall. Yesterday on my lunch I decided to run over and see what CJ Banks had on their clearance racks. On the way I did my daily lunchtime check-in with Nate.
"What are you having for lunch?" He asked.
"I don't know. I am going to go to the mall and see what CJ Banks has on clearance."
"You mean you would choose clothes shopping over eating?! What kind of NUT are you?!"
"Female."
"Female is Latin for 'weird,' you know."

CJ Banks has great stuff right now, btw. The colors are amazing. I had to make a hard choice--longer denim skirt, black and red plaid skirt, and a blue and black dress that looked far better on me than I expected when I grabbed it. I went with the denim. Boring, but versatile, and the only one of the three choices that did not require black shoes. And all those choices were under twenty bucks. Imagine what I could have bought if I had money! LOL

Socks

So, I have this beautiful purple cardigan (Walmart, sixteen bucks, woulda bought it in four colors if budget had allowed). It is very flattering, soft and comfortable.

I have black skirts with which to wear it, but my only pair of black shoes are indescribably painful to wear, so I decided to wear it with a jean skirt, purple tights and my brown shoes. Right? Wrong. Except for online (www.welovecolors.com), I can't find plus-sized tights in anything but black and brown. Fat girls, you know, are supposed to hide themselves. So I turned to my second option: Knee-hi socks. I actually love these. They make me feel cute. But I had the darnedest time last night finding a pair to go with this outfit. No, I don't want fuzzy, dangly balls on them. No, I don't want purple and black (remember--brown shoes). Finally I chose the least of the evils--dark purple socks with narrow blue, green and raspberry pink stripes. These pink stripes are BRIGHT. But I wore them today in my determination not to be an invisible fatty.

Boy did I get comments! All of them good. But my favorite came from the only male commenter:
"LOVE your stockings! It's like Kelly Osbourn Goes To Church!"

Not what I was aiming for...but thanks anyway, lol.

Garcia

Penelope Garcia is my new hero. And when I say that, I mean the character specifically, not the actress, about whom I know almost nothing. Penelope, on the other hand, has grown nearer and dearer to my heart as we've watched the Criminal Minds series (which, unfortunately, CBS is not putting on their website this season and that, to be frank, majorly hoovers!).

Garcia is fat. Not Hollywood fake-fat, but actually fat. And, she doesn't try to cover it up, she doesn't hide herself away (well, she is hidden away in her office, but she is out and about town on non-work hours). She has experienced some negative feelings (that men aren't attracted to her), but in general she seems unashamed. And she definitely has style. While my hair will never be pink or blue, I appreciate her influence in my life. It's ok to wear bright colors, be fun and sassy, etc, despite body size.

I also appreciate that the writers have not, at least that I remember, portrayed her as a cheesburger-eating, lazy couch-potato fatty, nor have I seen her diet. Hooray! A normal, beautiful, wonderful woman who isn't a size 2 on TV.

All that to say that my outfit today is in Garcia's honor. It isn't blue or black, it isn't fade-to-wallflower-unnoticeable-if-I-am-invisible-no-one-will-see-my-fat plain. It's bright, it's horizontally striped, there are dark red tights involved, and it's just plain fun.

I Heart CJ Banks

Most of my clothes are pretty casual, so while we were out getting Nate a new winter coat (which was among the entire wardrobe he outgrew in 6 months), I stopped by CJ Banks to check their clearance racks.

Seriously, I think they are the only place I've been where a girl can buy a 40% off clearance skirt for 11 bucks and STILL they wrap it pretty and tuck the receipt in a little envelope and you leave feeling like a millions dollars!

Nate did not have as much fun as I did, though. He says I need a daughter, but I think what he means is he desperately needs me to have a daughter, LOL.