Scale Paradox

As a sort of compromise between the focus I used to have on the number on the scale and the Intuitive Eating and body acceptance lifestyle I strive for, I allow myself one weigh-in on the first or second of the month, if I bother to remember. Many months I don't. This morning I did. And now I wish I hadn't.

Why? Because I weigh less than the last time I remembered...which I think was two months ago, although I could be wrong. Not much less, and it is little enough that it could simply be a natural fluctuation. Really, statistically insignificant! But it has caused me to spend too much time today (read: more than five minutes) fighting the old diet mentality. Oh, gosh, what did I do to make the number go down? What could I do to make it go down more? If I lost x amount every y time period..I could weight blank by new year's.

Ugh. That is the mindset I happily gave up. That is the nasty psychological warfare of diet-shake companies and stupid women's magazines and such. I don't want that for myself.

Curiously, when the number is the same or above what it last was, I never have this problem. And that is the paradox.