Monday, November 23, 2009

Why Verizon Sucks

(I don't normally say 'sucks' but in this case, I can't find a better word! Worse words follow, FYI)

After spending hours and hours on the phone with Verizon, I think I have a good handle on why they suck. My experiences are as follows:
When I found out that I would be working from home (yay!) I phoned to ask them to upgrade my internet and add a landline. Since they are a telecommunications company, one would think this would be simple, but no...I was given a waiting period of WEEKS. Seriously? They couldn't explain except to say that an actual repairman had to come out. This made no sense, after all, I already had internet, and you can't tell me that no one who ever lived here had a landline. But I wouldn't want them to argue if they called MY company and I told them to stand on their head while pushing 'back'. So I waited.

On October 2, the repairman came to my house...and left...after doing nothing. He said the orders didn't make sense, he couldn't complete them, and told Nate to tell me to 'call the office.' Easier said than done! What office? What number? What do I ask?

I spent THREE HOURS that afternoon on the phone with at least seven people, hung up on twice, transferred innumerable times, and generally becoming convinced that Verizon has a maximum IQ for their employees. No one could figure out what was going on, give me any answers, or get anything taken care of. THREE HOURS, during which I was supposed to be working, but could not. After WEEKS of commuting to the site when I should have been working from home (it turns out all they needed to do was flip a couple switches...seriously). After that three hours, a supervisor named Cindy in St. Louis promised to call me after my bill came out to discuss compensating me for the hell they had put me through.

Today I was balancing my checkbook and found that Verizon had taken money from my acct. They are not supposed to do that. I have never received a bill, like I am supposed to and Cindy never called. So I just spent another hour on the phone with seven more people, none of whom were very helpful. And during that call I found that I had been OVERCHARGED as well. Nice news!

Here is what I have learned:
Verizon associates have no insight into their own company. Each associate can only see into your account as far as their own duties reach. So, for instance, if someone is a weekend worker in the phone department, they can only see enough to facilitate weekend emergencies with your phone, even if they are, say, working on a Monday morning. If someone is in the internet department, they cannot see that you have phone service. Now, this is a company that advertises BUNDLING. One would think that bundling would mean, you know...putting it all together.

Verizon associates cannot transfer phone calls internally. If they need to send you elsewhere, they would actually have to go through the same phone tree that you or I would have to go to, and that takes too much time and trouble, so they just dump you in there with no instructions even on which buttons to push. You never know who you will get next, and every single time you get someone, you have to start from scratch.

Verizon makes it difficult to speak to a supervisor. In the company I work for, if you ask for a supervisor, I will give you one--even if you have no good reason. At Verizon, they apparently have to type up a paper explaining why they would need to bother a supervisor.

Verizon doesn't give its associates any power. They don't get to make decisions. This would be in keeping with the maximum IQ requirement (I would guess smart associates get the hell out as soon as possible).

Verizon doesn't really care about their customers. I found the continual 'thank you for holding! you and your time are so important to us!' hold messages absolutely insulting given the experiences I have had with that company.

Now, I know my view is skewed by the fact that I work for THE company with the GREATEST customer service in this solar system. I know not all companies can be us, but can't they at least give a damn?

In my company, I can see what's going on in your account, even if has nothing to do with my job. My bosses trust me to make choices, even choices about giving away money, free product, etc. I don't have to explain myself. If you asked for a supervisor I would have one on the phone with you in a couple minutes, and that is whether you had a complaint or a compliment. If I needed to transfer you, the person I gave you to would almost always greet you by name and know why you needed to speak to them.

And we would never, EVER, make you spend three hours on the phone because of our own screw-up.


Anonymous said...

The word you are looking for is:
Verizon Hoovers!

Anonymous said...

The word you seek is:
Verizon hoovers!

Donna said...

No, it really does sound like they suck. LOL

We have Verizon wireless and are very pleased with them though. When we had Frontier for our landline...oh boy. They were right up there with Verizon for you! We still get "offers" from them...we'll give you $100 if you come back to us and sign a 2 year contract. Yeah, right...what do you think I am? Stupid?